Short black, café latte, decaf or the humble instant — what’s your coffee of choice? But more importantly, what does it say about the type of mum you are?
There’s no denying it. The only thing enticing me out of bed most mornings is coffee.
Sure, it’s usually of the pod variety and is typically lukewarm by the time I guzzle it down between preparing rice cereal for one child and a stack of Weetbix for the other. But those few sips – gulps – are like petrol for my 33-year-old flailing engine. Well, it’s enough to get me through to my mid-morning latte from my fave coffee shop at least. And I say mid-morning, but often it’s more like midday by the time I get both boys and myself decent enough to leave the house.
It seems this morning latte-orientated routine that I rarely deviate from offers enormous insight into my personality and psychological traits, according to new US research.
Clinical psychologist Dr Ramani Durvasula recently surveyed 1000 coffee drinkers to reveal your brew of choice has links to the way you embrace and live life.
In her book, You Are WHY You Eat: Change Your Food Attitude, Change Your Life, Dr Durvasula explains black coffee drinkers are generally straightforward and no-nonsense (don’t even think about throwing a tantrum kid), while latte lovers are more neurotic and people pleasing (yep!). Cappuccino sippers are obsessive and controlling and instant fans have a greater likelihood of being procrastinators (no offence).
With this in mind, I wonder what these popular coffee selections say about our approaches to parenting?
9. Latte lover
Always smiling and reasoning with child. Life’s a dream, or so it seems. Perhaps behind closed doors however, the witching hour leads to a nip of Kahlua finding its way into one’s mug!
8. Espresso slammer
A no-bullshit kinda woman, who doesn’t hesitate to pull an unruly child into line at home or in public – kids need boundaries, right?
7. Cappuccino sipper
A levelheaded, routine queen who keeps the kids and household in order but longs for the weekend when you ensure the family planner includes a blocked out period for enjoying a slow and solo sipping of your favourite brew.
6. Decaf doer
Pregnant and conscious of it, but must always order a double shot in hope that it tastes like the real thing (how many weeks to go?).
5. Long black lady
You’re counting calories in a bid to shift a little post-bub blow out or concerned your breastfed babe is lactose intolerant. Either way, caffeine hits should be taken seriously and this order is a perfect reminder of your old self – you know, when you could solve global warming over coffee!
4. Piccolo princess
You live in an uber cool suburb with an endless selection of cafes. Perhaps the only thing giving away your motherhood is that yellow crust on the shoulder of your hip flannelette shirt.
3. Macchiato mistress
There’s nothing wrong with being a little fancy, and good on you for maintaining your mystique. Who wants to sit around drinking large mugs of hot milk anyway? Your life motto is: be efficient to be effective.READ MORE 125 Best of Stay At Home Mum Funny Memes
2. Pod popper
I get it, some days, the self-indulgent café visit just isn’t feasible! And, the pod machine is nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, with added intensity varieties these days, your mummy friends will be congregating in your kitchen while the kids run wild out the back. Trust me!
1. Instant drinker
There’s a real chance yesterday’s cuppa is still on the coffee table but, hey, you’re a busy mum who always puts the kids first. After all, they’re not little for long!