Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

How do you leave your husband with no money and two small children?

Really feeling over it all and sick of feeling depressed in this household. How is it possible to leave with no money and two kids to look after? I feel like I’m stuck because of the money.

Report

Got an Answer?


Answers (6)

You don’t yet.
Honestly if there’s not abuse or immediate danger just think is it worth how hard it’s going to be?
What I suggest is you start building your way out. Start looking for work, start saving money for the rental deposit, start finding a job that you can make work with or without him (then when you split it’s a great if there is help.)
Start looking for at 2 bedroom units and find areas you can afford.
If you can find a way to either give your marriage one last crack, work work your tinetables to where you don’t see each other much and it’s all about the kids.
If you can I would highly suggest sticking it out till they’re in school at least.


Remember though the trenches of young kids are hard and it hurts a lot of marriages die by young children. Sometimes it seems so important and the gap so big in the midst of sleep deprivation and poor time banks.
Step back and see do you really want to leave him or are there factors here?

Book an appointment to see or phone call with a Centrelink social worker.
Maybe a councillor for you plus couples councilling first

Get a job
See a counsellor
Is hubby abusing you ?
He will seek custody and your depression history will pop up and there is a good chance you will lose custody of your children

Your options;

Communicate, go to coucilling and split amicably.
Stay and start squirrelling away extra money, then leave.
Go to a family member or friends house.
Seperate under the same roof and claim single parent pension.
Go to a women's shelter and have you basic needs supplied until you apply for single parent pension.
Stay and gain employment and independence, then leave.

If he's violent you can call the police, have him served with a DVO and stay in the house until you're able to leave or you can go to shelter and get an emergency payment from centrelink.

You can get a subtle parent payment whilst still under the same roof for a period of time.
Before you call it a day can you have a weekend away? Life can be shit but that's just life. Sometimes things can turn around when you least expect it.
It's such a hard question when there are so many factors we don't know.